According to the dictionary definition, a 'girlfriend' a girl or young woman with whom a man is romantically involved and a 'boyfriend' a man who is the lover of a girl or young woman. These expressions have existed since the Victorian times, a girl is "romantically involved" with her "lover" – all hinting towards a sexual relationship. In extension, the romantic interest is serious- an exclusive relationship. Referring to someone as your 'girlfriend' or your 'boyfriend' is a specific description.
Relationship titles have changed, however. In our parent's day and age, couples went steady. The term boyfriend/girlfriend meant someone you were serious about. Today these terms are used in high school as "more an accessory used to decorate a sentence." (i.e. 'I'm goin' to the movies with my boyfriend/girlfriend.')
Titles have become meaningless. What signifies a boyfriend or girlfriend – just the sense of security, entitlement, or the ability to claim someone as your own. I know so many women that feel validated by titles, hearing him say, 'Hey, this is my girl.' Unfortunately, for men it doesn't work that way- they want their options, not to feel tied down to just one woman and to answer to no one about who they've been fucking. As Wale puts it, "Us men like to have the safety valve. The option to be able to say, 'But we're not in a relationship.' In other words, a get-out-of-pu$$y-jail-free card."
But my question is, what do you refer to someone that you've dating for some time, "the not-quite-my-boyfriend-but-we-still-f*c% associate." So many times, I myself have gotten into these types of relationship situations because it's too hard to gage someone's true feelings. No one wants to be the first to admit how they feel- women today find themselves putting it all out on the table (sometimes too early) and 'men' don't know how to deal.
To let the truth be told, men nowadays don't want to accept responsibility-they want to ignore the known and continue to go through their relationships with blinders. They've forgotten about the dates, deep conversations, showing you off to his friends and maybe even family and at the end of the night, lay you down as if you are the only one. But as time passes by, days turn into months-months turn into seasons- seasons turn into years- years of the same thing with no commitment. The ability to do all those boyfriend/girlfriend or relationship things with no commitment to each other.
Bottom-line no one likes restrictions, no matter from where or whom it's coming from. With commitment come restrictions. Restriction in a dictionary definition means something that restricts; a restrictive condition or regulation; limitation. "Not being able to sleep around, not being able to go to clubs every other night, and constant nagging about the aforementioned."
As the world continues to evolve, so does our culture, beliefs, and values. Will we ever get back to the golden times of when love was nothing to be ashamed of and we're not too scared to step up to the plate and call someone our boyfriend/girlfriend? I personally believe especially with my generation, we are too far gone. We have gotten away from the quite simple steps of courting someone and identifying him or her as the potential one. The title of boyfriend/girlfriend carries heavy weight of a potential future, building a life together to make that ultimate step of marital bliss.
Our society has made everything about convenience, with meaningless titles of boo, significant other, or just plain ole fuck buddy. But who's to say by putting the title of boyfriend/girlfriend will make everything ok or less complicated. Love and emotions cannot be easily defined, and it changes, sometimes day to day, or even hour to hour. So I guess what I'm trying to say is nothing in life is predictable or guaranteed. And no, no one wants to get hurt or have their heartbroken but I'd rather love than not have loved at all. Nothing in life is easy and neither is love and relationships.
To view the official article visit: http://www.honeymag.com/2010/uncategorized/go-go-answer-get-wale-2/
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